Journal Entry 15

Date: Monday, July 22 , 2024

Medicine: Huachuma

Dose: Full cup of peaceful medicine + extra gluck

Experience:

Felt out of place today and sensed that I didn’t belong. Felt again like a silly old man sitting in the woods using drugs and wondered what I was doing here. Felt very lonely and disconnected.

Realized next day that I was homesick. I missed Rita and my home and my pets. Sergey pointed out that this was when I started thinking of our recently purchased house as my “home”, and not just another house (we’ve had many).

Note: This was supposed to be the first day Rita was joining me but her flight was canceled because the airlines pushed out a bad security fix. She was discouraged and unhappy when we talked in the morning and questioning whether or not she should cancel. I’m sure this carried through into my ceremony.

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