Date: Friday, September 20, 2024
Medicine: Huachuma
Dose: Very full cup of “peaceful” medicine + parika
Experience:
My last day of this experience. Sergey surprised me this morning with the last cup of “peaceful” medicine he had created for me. He saved it for my last day for closure. It feels amazing.
I spend the day reviewing my trip, my journal, my progress, the entire experience. I am saying goodbye for now to the forest, the field, and the river. I know I want to come back and do more work, perhaps in a year or two.
In the last hour I was sitting by the river and I pulled out the crystal Alex had gifted me. It is beautiful and multi-faceted. Alex came by and knelt in front of me. He had me look at the sunlight through the crystal. He asked if I could see all the micro-cracks; the tiny imperfections that reflected and prism’d the light in a dazzling display. He pointed out that the flaws are what actually make it beautiful. That if they weren’t there it would just seem a featureless piece of glass. He said that this crystal represents me and all my flaws and beauty and that’s why he gave it to me.
He asked me if I loved the crystal and I said “yes”. He asked “then isn’t that loving yourself?”. And for the first time in this trip, and possibly ever, I felt some self love. The parting gift from my friend, Huachuma, Sergey, and everything that went into this experience was some self love.