Journal Entry 8

Date: Sunday, July 7 , 2024

Medicine: Ayahuasca

Dose: 1 cup (ayahuasca cups are small)

Experience: 

I arrived Saturday morning the 6th and had one day to rest before my second ever ayahuasca ceremony. This time the Ayahuasquero was named Orlando and he was visiting from where he lives in the Amazon. Sergey promised not to โ€œbreak meโ€ this time. Orlando is a very pleasant man, always smiling and chuckling. He is another one with a beautiful singing voice for Icaroโ€™s.

He gave me just one cup of his own medicine, and again I was just one of 3 people participating in the ceremony. I was braced for another launch into hyperspace but this time it came on differently. About 20 minutes in I started noticing a gentle body high. It came on quickly, but not overwhelmingly. It felt like about an equivalent of 2 grams of mushrooms, very pleasant. Orlando came and sat at the foot of my mattress and sang an Icaro just for me. I sat facing him. It was dark but I could make him out. He was smiling and rocking back and forth so I matched him. It was fun and I was enjoying it. When he finished he asked me how I was in Spanish; โ€œCรณmo estรกs?โ€ I said โ€œGoodโ€. With a smile he said โ€œGood?โ€ and I said โ€œGoodโ€. Laughing he said โ€œVery good?โ€ and I said โ€œVery goodโ€. He said โ€œVery goodโ€ as he touched my chest and my head exploded.

This was the first time in my life I believe I have seen actual magic. The instant Orlando touched my chest I went from a nice pleasant high to rainbow lights drilling into my forehead, knocking me back into lying down. It didnโ€™t hurt, but it was abrupt and intense. I immediately started back on my roller coaster ride through chaos. In the next 4 hours Orlando sang Icaroโ€™s to the other 2 guests and just in general. With the sound of his voice he brought me back into pleasantness thinking it was over and then plunging me back into chaos, probably 5 or 6 times. About 4-4 ยฝ hours later he called an end to it, and in about 20 more minutes the medicine had faded to where I could get up.

As I previously stated, ayahuasca is supposed to show you โ€œwhatโ€ you need to deal with. After this second ceremony I was still struggling to understand what it was I was supposed to have learned from ayahuasca. It was weeks later in huachuma that I realized that I can no longer handle chaos in my life and I need to learn to control it. In the first ceremony I fought for control and in the second Orlando showed how it could be effortlessly controlled. Huachuma was to show me how.

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